Hollywood and video games have been trying to hook up for years, but the relationship rarely works out. The latest attempt can be seen in a series of official viral videos for Red Alert 3, the most recent installment in Electronic Arts’ venerable Command & Conquer game franchise (or, as fans call it, “C&C”).
Set in an alternate history where World War II never happened and the Soviet Union never collapsed, the games turn the Cold War into a sci-fi slugfest, albeit one with a wacky strain of humor. The story is advanced by cut-scene videos that feature a cast of mid-level stars, some silly (Jenny McCarthy, Gemma Atkinson), some respectable (Jonathan Pryce, Coen Brothers regular Peter Stormare), some beloved (George Takei, Tim Curry).
The online videos attempt to give you quick tastes of the storyline, as well as the game’s comic appeal. They also seem to be inspired by last year’s great World of Warcraft ad campaign featuring William Shatner, Mr. T, and other camp stars. In comparison to those, most of the Red Alert videos are just shrug-worthy. On the plus side, there’s Freudian psychosexual sass from Kelly Hu and John McCain-esque ranting from J.K. Simmons; gamers will giggle most at the in-joke reference to Grand Theft Auto and sandbox games. (And I can’t believe EA let the developers get away with this one, a reference to Sporn.)
Besides being a quick office diversion, however, what’s the point of trying to make these videos go viral? While countless celebrities have appeared in video games, there’s little evidence they improve sales, especially when the actual game has little in common with the cut scenes in between. C&C is a real time strategy title, a genre that turns obsessive compulsive micromanagement into a game — in other words, the polar opposite of all this hijinks. Worse still, none of the videos depict Red Alert’s actual gameplay, the core selling point to any title. The C&C dance remix is way better all around — kickass in-game footage and Sulu uttering the immortal words, “All your base are belong to us.” How can you go wrong with that?
