Barely more than a recapitulation of previous boob-centric fare from Iron Sink Media (Roommates, Downstairs Guys), ModelBall tells the Skinemaxical tale of Holly McBride, a model who plays softball in a men’s league with her cousin, Jake, a preternaturally gifted softballer so hounded by gambling debts he bets $50,000 that he can lead a team of professional female models to the league championship.
In the hands of better talent, this might not be an unsalvageable premise (even Baseketball grossed $7M). But the series takes itself too seriously to be any fun. Too much time’s wasted on character introductions, e.g., Holly, who says the other players treat her “like just another one of the guys” — drawing that last word out, with the breathy, soft-porn purr of a woman who’s never without a manicure.
Then she introduces her cousin, Jake, as “arguably the best player in the league” — as if, even now, other teams were sitting in dank bars debating the vicissitudes of his softball prowess.
Sadly, they are. During the first vid’s extended bar scene, Jake and his ratty-bearded competitor argue about how good Jake really is — including a flashback to that day’s game, approving spectators and all. The ratty beard guy complains that Jake’s team has six of the best players in the league, leading Jake to bet $50K — apparently to be collected by the league’s grizzled repo man? — that he could beat anyone with a team of models. The money, he says, will get him out of gambling debts.
If Iron Sink’s going to produce skimpy fare like this, at least it could do so with a wink. As is, the acting’s earnestly atrocious, and there’s far too little skin shown to be worth the effort. Also, Iron, please fix your web site, where the series is currently advertised by the pathetic (grammatically and otherwise) banner, “Can group of gorgeous softball women compete in a beer softball league without breaking a nail?”
ModelBall is slated to air three times a week for 20 episodes on IronSink.com and YouTube. That the first episode is currently ranked No. 69 most viewed on the latter is a sublime wonder of horndog profundity.
